Bivona – Open That Bottle Night

This was our second time attending this Bivona Child Advocacy's Open That Bottle Night as the guests of our friends Tom and Glen, and we were deeply moved, again, by the event. It's a fun evening for a somber cause, and you can't help but be overwhelmed by the scope of the problem, and the depth of generosity to help address it. It was an emotional roller coaster.

Tom and his magnum!

376 people attended, including Maggie Brooks, Bob Duffy, and Sandra Doorley. In this time of extreme partisanship, it is nice to rally around a non-partisan issue. Mary Whittier, Executive Director, shared some mind-boggling statistics: 1 in 10 kids suffers from some sort of abuse by age 18, 90% of them by someone they know, love, and trust; there is a relatively high proportion of boys, as well as kids in the suburbs who suffer. Bivona has evaluated 12,513 kids in 10.5 years and it now sees 1500-1600 kids per year. Remarkably, their $4.5 million capital campaign has been exceeded by $700,000. They will be moving into their new building at 1 Mount Hope Avenue this August, where they will be more productive in their coordination of 21 different agencies that work together to help kids of physical and sexual abuse, to minimize the children's traumatization of having to retell their stories multiple times, and to help the DA's office prosecute better.

some of the silent auction items

Mary then read a 13-year old's “impact statement” that the girl had read in open court. She had been abused for years by her stepfather, who threatened that no one would believe her if she told. She worried about her sisters when they were with her stepdad, and felt guilty at breaking up her family. Her stepfather received a sentence of 18 years. Later, a founding board member and survivor took the podium and told her story. Like the other girl, she was told that no one would believe her. Her abuse started at age 7, and Christmas, when lots of family were around, was her only reprieve. She has moments she can't remember, and moments she can't forget. But she found the support to tell her story and move forward. There were tears in many of our eyes, agreeing with her that there are “things a child should never have to do.”

our table

The paddle call strategically followed, and at one point, the woman at the table to my right raised her paddle and confided conspiringly over her husband's empty chair between us, “he's in the bathroom, right?” The live auction bidding was indeed lively, with all items going well over value (the $1200 package of restaurant certificates went for $10,000, and the bidder received hugs and a kiss from Mary!), and most times a second item was offered to the second-highest bidder if s/he'd match the top price (which they almost all did). By the time we left, after the 13^th of 22 live auction items, they had already raised $73,000. It was heartening that many of the silent auction items were bid above value – this was not a crowd looking for a discount.

My husband and I remarked on our way home what a lovely and well-organized event it was, and how lucky and proud we are to live in a community that is so engaged in helping others less fortunate. We have a long way to go, but we're making small steps in the right direction, and, to use Bivona's motto: “building hope.”