Mammogram Mill

When I lived in New Jersey, a radiology appointment at my medical center (whether for an x-ray of a possibly broken bone or a mammogram) was always kept, +/- 5 minutes, and I never had to wait for results, or return for a re-scan.  So it came as a shock to me last year when I went to the Elizabeth Wende Breast Care (EWBC) center for my annual mammogram that dozens of women seem to have an appointment for the exact same time, and when you check in, you are given two options:  spend about 90 minutes, assuming you wait for your results in case you need a re-scan; or leave (after spending about an hour just for the exam) at your own peril, because if you have to be called back for a re-scan, they threaten you with a 3+ hour wait!  Most people just stay.  In fact, women actually plan ‘mammogram parties’; they deliberately schedule their exams at the same time so they can hang out (in ill-fitting hospital gowns) for a couple of hours together.  The waiting game is such big business at the center that you can also book a massage or peruse a selection of jewelry for sale.

Last year, I also chose to wait and I’m glad I did.  When they called my name, it was from the ‘wrong’ door (not the one where you’re given the all-clear). I needed a follow-up digital scan because they had ‘seen’ something.  I foolishly asked what the second scan would cost, and that generated an additional 45-minute wait because of course there is no single answer to that question – it depends on who your insurance company is and what the negotiated rate is and whether you’ve met your deductible and whether the insurance company even covers a second scan.  An administrator delivered this news to me, along with an off-hand but frightening comment that the radiologists wouldn’t have recommended another scan if they hadn’t seen something “bad.”  Back into the sea of gowns I went for another half hour, between waiting for the second scan and then the results, that felt like longer, as I contemplated my fate.  It turned out that there wasn’t anything wrong, which came as a relief when they called me to the ‘right’ door. 

So this year, I went armed with a stack of magazines to catch up on.  I did not do as they recommend and stop caffeine two weeks before my appointment.  The reason for their recommendation relates to comfort during the exam, rather than anything medical or the clarity of the scan.  Seriously, endure two weeks without coffee/tea/chocolate/Coke, but with headaches and irritability?  It didn’t seem like a rational tradeoff for a bit less discomfort for a couple of minutes (and let’s face it, no way would stopping caffeine make it actually comfortable!).  There were about 20 women in the lounge (it’s hard to call it just a ‘waiting room’ when there’s a fireplace, an enormous fish tank, and a flat-screen TV) but this year I hardly made a dent in my reading.  I endured only a brief wait for the scan itself, and I was summoned to the ‘right’ door less than an hour after I initially checked in.

Apparently, how long you wait is really a crapshoot.  My friend Linda related that she had recently spent about 3 hours at the center (no re-scanning involved), and that it was difficult for her even to find a seat when she arrived. I’m guessing that EWBC overbooks, just as the airlines and hotels do, assuming some people will cancel or forget.  But in their case, if everyone shows up, there’s no need to bump or reimburse anyone for the delay.  And maybe they even get more massage bookings that way.